NOTES: All-Star Break Over

Two Sassians represent team
By Beth Sass / hereforthesass.blogspot.com

MINNEAPOLIS --Sass second baseman Placido Polanco and Sass closer Jonathan Papelbon were pleased to represent the Sass in the BBL All-Star Game on Sunday night. Placido, who has been feeling some back pain, played only three innings of the game, before being taken out. Jonathan pitched one inning, giving up a hit and striking out two.

“It was so incredibly cool to be there,” gushed Jonathan to Sass media upon his return to Sass Stadium Wednesday afternoon. “All these guys, big players, big names, and getting to be on the same team as them. I got to pitch the inning after a two-time Cy Young winner [Johan Santana]!”

Polanco was a bit more subdued, “The All-Star game is fun, no doubt about it. It’s always great to be playing the game with friends.”

Notes Return: The Sass Notes returned to Sass Stadium after the All-Star Game. They looked weary and tired, and are utterly silent when questioned about their whereabouts.

"I asked a couple of times," said owner Dawn Sass, "I missed them a lot, but they either clam up or change the subject every time."

Based on their lack of tan, it's clear no tropical vacations were involved. Outfielder Juan Encarnacion said he thought he saw them in a mall in Tampa when the Sass played there, leading many to believe the Notes went on a two-and-a-half long shopping spree.

"They've always felt a little trapped when working for Beth," JEn said. "Beth is creative and funny, but really low-key. The Notes like a bit more excitement. Based on their condition, I'm guessing they learned their lesson. At any rate, Dawn and I are hoping to score some shoe-buying information from them."

Name Change? Sassian reliever Darren Oliver joked that he was going to change his name, which brought out a shriek of agony from the managers’ office.

“He can’t do that! I’ll never learn his name then. It’s…Darrel, right?” said Manager Beth Sass.

Darren laughed, and picked up the marker, and added yet another name to the growing list on the clubhouse wall, simply headed, “Names Beth Has Called Oliver.” There are 46 entries on the list, which sounds unimpressive until Darren mentioned that he was omitted nicknames. “When Beth calls me something silly, like Freak, that doesn’t end up on the list. Only actual real names go on this list.”

Although Beth has been pretty good about sticking with the D’s--Sassians agreed that “Dan” is the most common mis-name Beth’s called Darren, he said sometimes surprising names come up. “I’m really not sure where Timothy came from.”

Speaking of names… Jeff Francoeur has been surprised by his jerseys this year.

“My last name was on the first jersey I wore, spelled properly. And then it started getting misspelled. Now, I never have any idea what’s going to show up on my back. Sometimes, it’s spelled right, but not always. It always starts with an F, but sometimes it’s Frank, sometimes Franc…once it was Fran--the guys still call me that from time to time.”

Kat, the equipment and uniform manager, said she simply took orders from Beth. “Beth writes or e-mails me what she wants on the jerseys. If it’s hand-written, that’s when misspellings happen. I never know if it’s actually Jeff’s uniform, or if we’ve got a new player with a last name like Francoeur’s.”

Beth shrugged. “My name is easy. I don’t have the capacity for complex names.”

Coming Up: Tonight, pitcher Chad Gaudin faces the undaunting task of starting for the Sass. As he will be facing the Minnesota Twins, it will be no one’s surprise if he continues on his path for an impressive record for 2007. Former Sassian Scott Baker will be on the mound opposing him.