Week Seven: Summary of Game

Sass Win! Sass Win!
Baseball and football players surprised
By Beth Sass / hereforthesass.blogspot.com

SEATTLE -- The Here for the Sass team announced early Tuesday morning that they somehow pulled off their second win of the year. The entire team gathered as Beth looked up the final scores. Initial reports Monday morning showed the Sass in the lead. Beth was momentarily confused on Tuesday, because it looked as if the Sass had lost yet another series. Here for the Sass relief pitcher Justin Duchschererererr gently pointed out to Beth that she was looking at the projected scores, and that the real scores showed a convincing 77.93-62.78 win.

“What do those numbers mean, anyway?” Beth asked.

Sass wide receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh started to explain to Beth how the total points per player were added up before she said, “Nevermind. Don’t even try. Baseball is much easier to figure out.”

Coming into the series, the Sass were 1-4-0, and Hell`s Jackalopes were 2-4-0, meaning both teams left the week with 2-5-0 records. “That’s very Sass of them,” said outfielder Michael Cuddyer.

Sass wide receiver Randy Moss led the team with 12.45 points. “Seriously? What do these mean? How are they calculated?” Beth asked Moss. Moss looked at her strangely and walked off to talk to Sass relief pitcher Brad Halsey, who was doing double-dutch jump roping with Sass running back Warrick Dunn, Sass first baseman Adam Dunn, and Sass third baseman Little Nicky Punto.

The highest score received by the defense was Erik Coleman’s 5.00.

The Sass celebrated their victory with Ghetto Cub cupcakes, which were shipped in from St. Paul. The entire baseball team was present to celebrate the win, along with many members of Mockball Madness, who joined Sass pitching coach and Mockball Madness starting pitcher Bronson Arroyo for the trip to Seattle.