Notes: All-Star Break

It couldn’t come at a better time!
By Beth Sass / hereforthesass.blogspot.com

PITTSBURGH -- The BFL is on All-Star Break for the next three days, and it couldn’t have come at a better time for the Here for the Sass team.

“We’re tired, we’re sore, we’re just looking forward to a few days to chill out and have some fun,” outfielder Rocco Baldelli said.

Most players in the BFL who are not on either of MLB’s All-Star rosters have chosen vacation plans elsewhere, but the Sassians have decided to hang out together as a team, with their families invited.

“I was planning on heading to the Bahamas for a vacation,” fair-haired outfielder Adam Dunn said, “But we discussed sunburning issues, and I decided to stay home. Then the whole Sass All-Star Break was decided, and I was glad I decided to stay!”

The Sassians are holding their First Annual All-Star Break Monopoly Tournament. All Sassians have paired up, and there will be multiple games going at once.

Kristin Benson and teammate Chan Ho Park immediately claimed the iron as their playing piece, while Juan Encarnacion and Aaron Harang immediately grabbed the shoe. The three men on the DL re-joined the team, and formed their own team of three.

Adam Dunn and Jermaine Dye paired up, as usual, leading to taunts from the rest of the Sassians that they couldn’t win Monopoly on home runs alone.

The entire tournament will take place in Pittsburgh, so Jermaine and A.J. can both take part in the Monopoly tournament and the All-Star game, and so Sassians can cheer them on.

DL Chutes and Ladders Udpate: With the Sass DL players joining the team for the All-Star Break activities, they brought with their official scoreboard. Julio Mateo, who had briefly led the competition, was saddened to see how far he had slipped. In fact, Grant Balfour has now taken over the leader board, having both the most wins and the highest winning percentage. Tomo Ohka, Matt Guerrier, and Grant were requested to put on a brief demonstration of a game, which they complied.

The Sassians were amazed how the games worked, but mostly were surprised that Grant was winning, giving his propensity to get distracted.

“Sometimes, I thought a game would have to be suspended, because Grant would get up for a drink, and sometimes it took so long, we were wondering if he was coming back,” Little Nicky Punto said. Matt and Tomo both admitted that the problem existed with Grant, but in Nice they were able to keep a closer eye on him, because there were less people around, and more staff and trainers to watch for Grant.

Hey, now, you’re an All-Star! Jermaine and A.J. both said they were looking forward to the All-Star game. Both men are reserve players, but have high hopes of getting in at least one at-bat. “I mean, I wouldn’t mind pinch-hitting, even,” A.J. said. “I love to play, so it would be great if they’d split up the time for the three catchers on the roster, but I’ll take whatever I can get.”

Jermaine knows he’ll get to swing the bat a few times in Pittsburgh, as he will take place in the batting contest tonight. KatHarriet has assured Jermaine that he will have a large supply of bats.

Get rid of That is a Very Bad Idea presentation “It doesn’t work anyway”. The replacement is being forced to write public apologies to the Sass fans.

“The presentation wasn’t working. The pitchers weren’t taking any lessons from the video to the field, and the players were sick of hearing it in the background,” Dawn said. “We’re trying something new.”

After the All-Star: After the All-Star Break, the Sass will have a short series with goesboom of Go Boom!

“We’re a little wary about facing him. e.e. is already shaking a little bit, but not from actually facing goesboom’s team, but rather the fear of the one day he’ll have to face R. Johnson. Quite frankly, Dawn and I are planning on skipping that day,” Beth said.